deep thought

He may die before morning. But I have been with him for three years. There's no way I could be cheated if I didn't have him for another day. I didn't deserve him for one minute, God knows.

And I may die before morning.

What I must to is die now. I must accept the justice of death and the injustice of more life. I have a good lofe - longer than many, better than most. A friend dies when he was twenty five. I have had thirty-one years. I couldn't justify another day. I did not create myself, it is a gift. I am me, that is the miracle. I had no right to remain a single hour. Some remain a single minute. And yet I have had thirty-one years.

Few consciously choose when they will die. I choose to accept death now. As of this moment I give up my right to live. And I give up my right to his life.

Ya Allah, give strength and guidance.